Wednesday, June 29, 2011

this anxiety can bite me

i am flying to san jose, ca on saturday with my friend bonnie. our friend meghan will pick us up at the airport and take us her to house in santa cruz where we will stay until tuesday evening. i am beyond excited but if you were to talk to me about this trip i would probably sound terrified. and that's because i am. all week i have had horrible anxiety about traveling on a holiday weekend. i am terrified that there aren't going to be ANY parking spots left when we get to the airport on saturday morning and i'm terrified that there are going to be horrendously long lines and that we're going to miss our flight. 

i have been up every night this week freaking out about the airport. the thoughts race through my head all day long and each time i feel like i am going to vomit because i'm so anxious. i don't think my anxiety has ever been this bad over anything. i cannot figure out what is causing me to be such a giant nutcase about this. i doubt i am going to sleep a wink on friday night. 

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